February 24th, 2003
World Heavyweight Champion: Triple H (since 12/15/02)
World Tag Team Champions: William Regal & Lance Storm (since 1/20/03)
WWE Women's Champion: Victoria (since 11/17/02)
Commentators - Jim Ross & Jerry "The King" Lawler
Eric Bischoff comes out looking beat to hell in a sling and all. He says Stone Cold is banned from the building tonight, but will be on the show next week. Tonight's main event is a #1 Contender's 20 person Battle Royal. Bischoff then introduces.. THE ROCK. Rock babbles a bunch and really gets the crowd going as they shower him in boos. He also announces he is entering the Battle Royal later tonight.
1) Jazz vs. Jackie
Victoria is on commentary and it’s honestly just fuckin awkward. Jazz wins this pretty quickly and proclaims once again that the bitch is back. TRISH STRATUS RUNS DOWN TO A HUGE POP AND They do a pull apart brawl thing. Welcome back Trish!
Stacy Keibler got Test set up with a gig at a company that turns out to be Girls Gone Wild. She’s upset after the fact, but doesn’t have long to cope because Chief Morley books her & Test against Jericho & Christian for later.
JR sits down with Goldust to talk about how he was electrocuted by Orton & Batista last week. Turns out this is where Goldy's signature stuttering develops from. Aside from that, Goldust says he will be back soon.
2) Kane (w/ Rob Van Dam) vs. William Regal (w/ Lance Storm)
"Oh yeah that's real impressive, Kane. Just make sure your mask don't get turned sideways." - Jerry Lawler
Squash for Kane, but it’s enjoyable while it last. Chokeslam gets the win and he & RVD seem to be back on the same page after last week.
Match rating - **
Backstage, Flair is helping Orton & Batista get ready for their match next.
3) Batista & Randy Orton (w/ Ric Flair) vs. Scott Steiner & Booker T
Match rating - **1/4
STONE COLD RETURNS TO RAW NEXT MONDAY
4) Chris Jericho & Christian vs. Test & Stacy Keibler
This turns into a disaster very quickly. The “match” itself barely lasts a minute or two before Jericho & Christian handcuff Test. Jericho then locks Stacy in the walls. Jeff Hardy runs down for the save, but fails. This leads to Shawn Michaels making the big save and cleaning house before helping Test get uncuffed.
Back from commercial, Jeff Hardy is recovering at ringside. Chris Nowinski comes out to make fun of him, but his mic isn’t working at first which is pretty funny. Nowinski calls Jeff a failure and the bell rings. Twist of fate and a swanton later.. Jeff wins. Well then BY GOD. Hardy jumps Nowinski even after the bell and won’t stop so the ref reverses the decision. Goodness gracious. This is a cluster fuck. Hardy chases Nowinski backstage and onward we go.
Backstage The Rock is on the phone. He starts playing guitar when The Hurricane walks up. They trade verbal jabs including a Scorpion King joke from Hurricane. Hurricane asks Rock if he can fly because tonight he’s gonna send his ass flying over the top rope in the battle royal.
5) Jerry Lawler vs. Chief Morley - No DQ Match
This was juuust fine! Lawler can still go and Morley can too. Nice punches from both guys. They brawl around ringside using the steps and the post. Morley clearly has Lawler beat at one point and decides to get a chair. Earl Hebner kicks it out of the ring which pissed Morley off. Morley tries to strike Hebner, but the Dudleys show up and 3D him to a huge reaction. Lawler hits his fist drop for the win.
Match rating - **3/8
Yeah I just threw a 3/8th in there fuck you.
Backstage, Ric Flair is telling Batista & Orton to focus on the battle royal and not their tag team loss earlier in the night.
6) #1 Contender's Battle Royal - Winner faces Triple H at WrestleMania for the World Heavyweight Title
Match rating - **
The Rock is shocked, but claps for Booker as Booker celebrates in the ring to close the show.
Post a Comment