February 10th, 2003
Los Angeles, California
World Heavyweight Champion - Triple H (since 12/15/02)
World Tag Team Champions - William Regal & Lance Storm (since 1/20/03)
WWE Women's Champion - Victoria (since 11/17/02)
Commentary - Jim Ross & Jerry "The King" Lawler
Eric Bischoff opens the show. He tries to get the crowd behind him for his evaluation with Vince by saying it's nice to be back in LA with "his people" and not with the toothless rednecks in Texas at the bars he visited trying to find Steve Austin. They boo him and he says that if that's how they want to be that's fine, because until Vince shows up, he is still the boss around here and he can do what he wants. Therefore, he proceeds to fire Jim Ross and blames him for Steve Austin not meeting up with him and signing a contract. Bischoff says the only way he's allowed back is if he brings Stone Cold to him.
A limo arrives and Bischoff thinks it's Vince, but it turns out to just be Evolution. Triple H says "why the long face, Eric?" as they strut into the arena.
1) Test (w/ Stacy Keibler) vs. Christian
JR apparently got fired so, Lawler is by himself and it’s awkward. They send Jonathan Coachman out half way through this match to join him. The match happens and that’s about it, it’s more like background music to Lawler & Coach discussing everything that happened. Test wins and Christian attacks him post match. He targets Stacy, but Jeff Hardy runs out and makes the save? I guess he’s not gonna go heel then..
We get a Booker/Goldust video package that I FID NOT NEED. I am still sad.
2) Booker T vs. D-Lo Brown (w/ Teddy Long)
Book is cutting a promo on Goldust and last week. D-Lo interrupts. Teddy says Goldust was just trying to hold him down and he should be teaming with D-Lo tonight, not facing him. Book whoops D-Lo’s ass in a matter of moments.
Match rating - *3/4
3) Jazz vs. Molly Holly
This has surprisingly way less botches than most women’s matches around this time. Molly is in mom clothes again. Jazz taps out Holly after a pretty okay little match. She refuses to break the hold though. And then also attacks her post match.
Match rating - **
Backstage, Howard Finkle thinks he just heard JR on the phone with Stone Cold, but it was just his friend “Steve from Oklahoma.”
4) Rob Van Dam & Kane vs. 3 Minute Warning (Jamal & Rosey) (w/ Rico)
Great sprint. Jamal & Rosey isolated RVD. Kane gets the hot tag and then they do a sweet finishing run. Van Dam with the five star for the pinfall.
Match rating - **1/2
Jim Ross is on the phone still trying to contact Stone Cold, but MEANWHILE VINCE IS HERE AND HE SAYS “WHAT IN THE HELL IS JR DOING IN THE PARKING GARage?” OH FUCKXKMDJE
BACK FROM COMMERCIAL AND VINCE IS PISSED AS SHIT ON HIS WAY TO THE RING. He requests the presence of Bischoff and doofus Morley. Vince handles Morley first saying he won’t fire him even though he hasn’t fulfilled his obligations however his fate will be on the line in a match later against BUBBA, D-VON AND SPIKE. THE DUDLEY BROTHERS!!!! In the words of Vince himself, lmao. Eric is next and Vince asks him one question - “have you signed Stone Cold?” Bischoff beats around the Bush until he’s forced to straight up tell him no. Bischoff tries to bring out the hot lesbians to seduce Vince as tonight they are apparently “BISEXUAL LESBIANS” .. jesus. Vince says tonight he’s all business and tells them to take their ass back up the ramp. Vince then proceeds to FIRE ERIC BISCHOFF. MY GOD. I didn’t expect this to happen! Vince then says “I feel so damn good about firing Eric Bischoff, I’m gonna sing him a song” and leads the crowd in na na na na hey hey good bye while strutting and it’s fucking hilarious.
Back from commercial, Vince runs into William Regal & Lance Storm backstage who are kissing his ass. Vince says if they think what he just did was brilliant, wait until they see who he names as the new GM later tonight... O H MY LORD
5) Sean Morley vs. The Dudley Boyz (Bubba Ray, D-Von & Spike Dudley)
The Dudleys get their sweet revenge on Morley and beat his ass for a few minutes using various weapons and subsequently win and send him packing. After the match, they put him through a table for good measure.
In the parking garage, Bischoff tries to make amends and befriend Jim Ross. Ross tells him to go clean out his desk.
6) Batista (w/ Ric Flair) vs. Tommy Dreamer
Squash. Dreamer attacks Batista from behind with the cane, but it does him no good. Batista bomb and 1..2..3.. for Dreamer.
Post match, Booker T runs down and lays into Batista to prevent an assault on Dreamer. He gets Orton, Flair and H for his troubles. Scott Steiner makes the save and Evolution retreats.
Stacy has Test backstage and says she has booked him appearances with “GGW” and that it will be great exposure even though she has no idea what it is exactly.
The Dudleys show up to Eric’s office as he’s moving out and sing him out.
7) Chris Jericho vs. Jeff Hardy
This went way longer than I ever expected and it was pretty decent. Hardy got a nice near fall on Jericho off a swanton, but is forced to tap soon after via the Walls of Jericho.
Match rating - **1/4
Vince passes Evolution in the back and asks where they’re going. Flair responds with “to the strip, bitch!” and starts dancing around. Vince says his GM announcement is next and also that Batista/HHH will face Booker T & Scott Steiner next week!
Vince comes out to name the new General Manager. Only for Jim Ross to interrupt and apparently Stone Cold is confirmed for No Way Out so Vince reinstates Bischoff, but only if he joins the kiss my ass club. Eric refuses so Vince makes Bischoff vs. Stone Cold for No Way Out.
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